Music and my brain and soul and heart...well all the best bits really.

I have always loved music. All kinds of music with a few exceptions that are really more about me disliking the lyrics or the message that is conveyed. For instance...I have always disliked The Rolling Stones "Under my Thumb" and I think the reasons are pretty self-explanatory.

My IPod is an eclectic mixture of all sorts or "rubbish" so in a sense it is much like my poor ADD brain. It's just all over the place. There is old school country from the 50's; pop from the 60's; soul, disco and all sorts of wonderfully bad stuff from the 70's; 80's electronica, punk and new wave; 90's grunge; and various oddness from a more recent age.

I remember the first ever record that I bought myself was a 45 of Tommy James's "Draggin' the Line." God, I loved that song. My first album was a really horrible piece of trash by a band called Bloodrock. The song was "DOA" and it was so morbid that I am surprised I survived listening to it. I used to treasure the Saturday mornings when my parents were out of the house so I could turn on American Bandstand and practice all the latest dance moves. Fat people got rhythm man...Charlie Brown says so!

My mom and dad loved music as well. As did my Grandfather B. I still have his albums somewhere packed away. Dad was more fond of honkytonk and old school country. Mom was always singing something really off key. She always told me she was in Glee club and I think she was very proud of that but man...singing was not really her forte. She had many other lovely qualities though so we shall give that a pass. My dad had a beautiful, deep, bass voice when you could get him to sing which was VERY rare. Alas, I inherited the deep, booming voice but also my mothers lack of knowing how to be on key. The radio was always on in the house or the car if the Cardinals were not playing. I grew up with a great soundtrack.

One of my fondest memories involves me, a forbidden song and a transistor radio with ear phones. You see there was this song  that ALL of the local radio stations had banned so we just knew it must be awesome! It was filth! So, of course, I had to listen to it for myself. So one summer night I laid in my bed with the window open and worked and worked to get my radio to pick up the Greenfield station. They were being rebels and playing said filth. So I finally got a rough signal and put the ear phones on a waited patiently. I didn't have to wait too long which was good considering I probably would have fallen asleep. On it came...The Tubes..."Don't Touch me There." I remember thinking...really? I expected so much more from a banned song but it was so worth the experience. I wonder what those same radio execs would think of "Back that thing up"? I digress...

Certain songs I will always connect with certain places and feelings. BTO's "Taking Care of Business" will always remind of being at the pool in the summer. The Hollies "Long, Cool Woman in Black Dress" will always remind me of summer evenings. Wham's "Careless Whisper" will always remind of my first love's betrayal. These things, good or bad, are priceless parts of our memories and our souls.

I have a fondness for women with strong voices. I cannot imagine why she says with a wry smile. I love Patsy Cline, KD Lang, Dusty Springfield, Jeanie Shepherd, Roberta Flack, Karen Carpenter, Barbara Streisand, Adele, Florence Welch...the list goes on and on. I love a woman that will just belt a song out with strength and great emotion. I love the way Chrissie Hynde caressed songs with the Pretenders. I love the saucy, swagger of an old Joan Jett song. I love the power of Pat Benetar and the strength and beauty and general rock goddessness of Ann and Nancy Wilson. All of these women and more I have forgotten have meant so much to me throughout the years. They have empowered me, gave me a voice, gave me an outlet for my jumbled emotions. And damn that Bonnie Raitt makes me cry every time I hear "I can't make you love me." I hate it and love it at the same time.

What I am trying to say is that music is my primary source of expression. If I cannot find the words I will often send you a song. I feel so strongly about the music that I love and listen to that I get self-conscious about other people hearing what is playing. Is it a fear that they will judge me? Maybe. Is it a fear that them hearing it will take away some it's magic for me? Maybe. Is it that is so much a part of my soul and I am being that selfish about sharing it? Most likely. Despite the fact that you will often see me driving down the road singing at the top of my lungs (off key I am sure) it is an intensely personal moment for me. Music is my friend, my therapy and my love. Rock on every one! Find your musical niche and embrace it and hug it and love it and express it and sing lustily along to it.