Disclaimer: This blog in not intended to mock fish owners or the individual fish or anything to do with fish.
My brain is tangent driven. Give it a new bit of knowledge and it will run wild with it like a friend of mine who shall remain anonymous chasing a shoe sale. Today I had just such an experience so here goes....
I was in the kitchen at work stocking up the essential items so that no one dies tomorrow morning when I noticed a bag of semi-frozen peas lying on the counter near the coffee machine. I must admit...I looked around to see if someone was punking me. Then I thought...hmmm...someone forgot their peas...I shall remind them because it is almost 5 pm and I am not sure these peas should be left out unattended. So I paged the person missing their peas to come and collect them please. Well...that didn't work...no one was claiming the poor little things. So I paged again seeking guidance. Do I put them back in the freezer? Do I put them in the fridge? Were they trying to defrost them? How am I supposed to know? Because as SURE as I put them in the freezer someone will get upset because they were thawing them out for their morning smoothie tomorrow.
This caused much laughter amongst my co-workers but hey...I am not my vegetable's keeper here people and you need to step up and claim your foliage. I just needed some guidance. Finally...a very nice guy who is pretty new to our little village came by to tell me he thought they belonged to his office mate and they could go back in freezer. Finally...some guidance....
And THEN that's when I found out a new bit of knowledge that has caused me much joy and mirth. He said his office mate feeds the peas to his fish. WHO KNEW?? I had no idea you fed peas to fish in a non-bait sort of a way. I find this tidbit both fascinating and funny as hell. Immediately my two office mates and I start googling and the internet continues to provide me with the most amazing trivial information. We have turned the internet into a giant research tool for Trivial Pursuit. It's awesome!!
We found pages of information on feeding peas to your fish. Even a you tube tutorial on how to feed peas to your fish. I say again...who knew?? Evidently this is a good idea because certain kinds of fish have digestive issues. Seriously?? Have we made the world so stressful that even the FISH have irritable bowel problems?? And then I thought...how on earth do you know your fish is constipated?? Does he/she swim up to the side of the bowl and look at you with the same frowny face we make when we can't go? Do you have to look out for them floating for long periods of time in one corner with a magazine? I wonder if their fins fall asleep like our legs do? Does he/she hold up a little sign saying...mom or dad...I can't poop? One of my office mates said that if your fish has buoyancy issues you may have to hold him/her while you feed him/her the peas. How can a fish have buoyancy issues?? Do they even make little fish floaties to help them out? I find this sort of thing just fascinating to think about and I will annoy people with it for days so count your blessings if you are not around me every day.
I know you will think I am odd for thinking this and you are not far wrong but I find these sorts of things fabulously fun to think about. I laugh until I snort and pee a little. But I will guarantee you right now I will store away this fact like all of the other millions of threads of minutiae that live in my brain. My blessing and curse is that I remember stuff like this forever!! This would be why I have trouble sleeping at night. This sort of little non-descript tidbit gives me great joy. It's like cardio for my brain. So tonight I will go to sleep thinking about all the fish in the world who need peas and the people who love them. I wish them health and much buoyancy.
